Friday, October 8, 2010

Appropriate First Date Conversation

First dates. Where to begin. First dates depending on your age and place in life can range in being thrilling and exciting, nerve racking or something more straightforward like an interview. The first date is obviously one that is crucial and pivotal in determining if there will be a second date, a third, a fourth etc. When preparing for a first date remember that the most important thing is to be yourself, sounds simple right? You want to make sure, whether you're a girl or a guy that you make a positive first impression. First impressions are everything. It's the most important impression you'll ever make and like it or not you only get one chance to make it. The likelihood of a second date literally hangs on the all important initial encounter someone has with you. After all it is said that people form impressions of you within seconds of meeting you. People take into account what you look like, how you sound/speak and the way in which you carry yourself.
Once you've scored a date and have a general idea as to what you're going to wear, you need to decide what you're going to be talking about. There are things that are appropriate to speak about on a first date and then there are things that you really should try to keep to yourself. When on a first date, keep the conversation somewhat open and simple. Ask your date what they do, where they went to school, maybe some of their hobbies and interests, tastes in music etc. Try not to talk to about money, politics, or religion. There are a few topics of conversation that if you begin to hear your date speak of, you should be considering running for door.
  1. When I say don't talk about money, I mean it. Don't. Never ever tell a girl you're poor or that you don't have any money, and that you're ok with that because money doesn't buy happiness. You may not have much and that's ok, but that's not something that you need to disclose on a first date. It's actually a great way to hint to a girl that she should go running for the hills. 
  2. Try not to talk about previous relationships. Don't tell your date that you're always "the nice guy" in relationships and that you're the one who always gets cheated on or walked all over. This is something I truly don't understand why men feel the need to share, do you think that we as girls will pity you? Because more than anything it makes you look weak and leads the girl to believe something about you must not be right. If you're looking for sympathy or pity maybe say you're dog recently died or that you are recovering from an extreme mountain biking accident. Something manly, get it?
  3. If you're unhappy in your current position at work, don't tell us. We don't want to hear how uninspired you are, or that you feel like you're under appreciated. No one likes to hear you complain. Long drawn out monologues about your awful career or unfortunate situation should be kept to yourself. There is nothing more unattractive. Also, don't speak ill of your boss or superiors, it's not exactly respectful and it's just not a good idea. 
  4. Make sure that all the conversation doesn't revolve around you, if you're anything like me being a Gemini, girls like to talk too. If you're sitting there doing all that talking, well that's boring and downright annoying. 
  5. Take it slow and don't be needy, think of this first date as the start of a new friendship. After all your potential significant other needs to be your best friend too right? There is no need for the immediate spouting of sonnets and poems, if you catch my drift. There really is no point in stressing or sharing your desire for some kind of immediate commitment. Because really what that tells your date is that you're desperate and to run. And then you get those guys who say things like, "oh I don't like to play games, or play hard to get" blah blah blah. Well the thing is boys, girls like to be complimented and all but don't like it so much if/when guys just fall apart right away. It's not even necessarily about playing games per-se, it's just that if you're always available and wanting to hang out it makes us think you don't have a life. We need time to miss you, to wonder if you're thinking about us etc. If you smother a girl right off the bat, I'm sorry to say you're doomed. Dating fortunately or unfortunately is kind of like a game. 
  6. If you didn't go to college or some kind of post high school institution that is ok. But I wouldn't recommend telling anyone that you dropped out of school/college because "school just isn't your thing" or that you felt like you weren't learning anything. Telling someone that you basically quit at something isn't exactly the most impressive thing you can say. You don't want people thinking you're a quitter now do you?
lululemon work out clothes may not be a horrible first date outfit, if you catch what I'm throwing down. 

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